One Word Can Keep Things Cool with Your Wife

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I have put my foot in mouth so many times that there is a size 9 footprint embossed on my tongue. To overcome my poorly-timed and ill-advised words, I’ve taken a page out of the family dog’s book: I will only say one word. [Read more…]

Barstool-Ski Lift Hybrid Reduces Drunk Driving

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Drunken driving has inflicted untold amounts of pain, misery and suffering, yet we seem at a loss for how to curb its deadly consequences. That’s because we’re not putting capitalism to work, folks. So let’s drink to the end of drunk driving with my new Barstool-Ski Lift Hybrid. [Read more…]

Finding the One Guy Who Owns Everything

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Every company on the earth is owned by some larger company, which in turn, is owned by an even larger company. But who owns all of that? One guy, I say. One guy owns everything, and I was determined to find him. [Read more…]

How to Make the Most of Abysmal Wisconsin Weather

Institute Floating Holidays for Abysmal Wisconsin Weather
It’s no picnic living in Wisconsin.  Dangerous wind chills during the winter, predatory mosquitoes and gawd-awful humidity during the summer – it seems like a dress rehearsal for eternal damnation.  My latest epiphany is designed to make the most of the days it actually is nice in this wretched state.  [Read more…]

Replace Corporate CEOs with First-Grade Teachers

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I’ve done my time in the corporate world, and it turned my stomach.  The infighting, politics, groveling, and backstabbing — it all starts at the top.  That’s why my latest epiphany replaces the CEOs of major corps with first-grade teachers.  Specifically, my first-grade teacher, Mrs. Smith.  (This week’s epiphany includes a special guest illustration from Phil Wong.) [Read more…]

The Gigi Epiphany

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Welcome another guest blogger to Alter the Course – Wright Forbucks.  My man Wright is a humorist extraordinaire and author of Billy Grist and the Walking Man.  His epiphany hits close to home for me, as it reveals why my mini-dachshund pisses me off on a regular basis.  Enjoy! [Read more…]

Civil War Lawn-Mowing Reenactment

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A new favorite American pastime is reenacting time that has passed – particularly the Civil War.  My latest epiphany, Civil War Lawn-Mowing Reenactment, turns our fondness for gory battles into cheap labor that I’m all-too-happy to exploit. [Read more…]